Now, let's see… There are 321,798,312 Americans. I close my eyes again. I open them. Still 321,798,312. Still 321,798,312?! How could that be? It takes about 20 seconds before another American is born. You really need to hump on, people. How come you're so slow today? So I was watching this movie my Colombian friend Angie recommended (not my American friend Angie or my Indian wife Angie or my mother's best friend's daughter Angie that I dry humped when I was too young to know what I was doing, except that I did want to contribute to this future website called worldmeters.info and make my attempt at I-didn't-know-what count)... So this movie, it's called Vicky Cristina Barcelona, and in it this handsome actor Javier Bardem says, "We are meant for each other and not meant for each other. It's a contradiction. In order to understand it, you need to be a poet, like my father." Does it also require a poet to believe that I'm so important someone out there is actally meant for me and I'm meant for her? (My wife... You think?) Look: 18,200 people dead today… 18,244... 18, 289... I'm rushing towards that cliff. I'd better say something meaningful.
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