MENTAL NOTE

"Though we cannot make our sun stand still, yet we will make him run."
Blue, resist the urge to use facebook. You can do it. Good luck.
Cats and dogs can be friends. So can cowboys and indians. So can we.
Why try to be the best when there's no hierarchy in heaven?

Saturday, December 5, 2015

When Competence Bites the Dust

Have you ever heard of The Power of the Dumb? Well, I have but, of course, whatever I'm about to disclose as I sit here minding my own business, taking a stroll down memory lane, happened to a friend of mine. I swear.


The Power of the Dumb is a force to be reckoned with. Unlike The Borg, they don't want to assimilate you into their collective but prefer to break you in half, swallow you whole and turn you into a stinky puddle of power poo. You may think you are as tough as Clint in the desert, but dumbness doesn't fight fair. The Dumbness Collective is a chicken shit bunch of no-goods with more power than you, unless you quit and seek employment elsewhere. Aha. Now you know what I'm talking about. Not who — what. Which brings me to my friend Al.

Al used to be so high-spirited. He was a man driven by passion and a strong belief in loyalty. He would show up at work with a sense of purpose and a pinch of pride, not only because he was truly convinced his students benefitted from his devoted teaching — they had unabashedly expressed their appreciation many a time, making him blush — but also because he always tried to fix whatever was broken without sending The Powers That Be a hefty bill for services rendered. He was the pragmatic type. He did whatever was necessary to assist his students, and one of those things was to create a website that actually worked. You see, his poor students were forced to use Dino.com, a website that honored its name by transporting its users to a time when drag and drop was yet to be discovered (if ever — probably not), user friendliness a crime, and speed akin to Presley's vulgar hips in the future 1950's. Al solved all of that. He set up a first-rate website that offered easy access, didn't frustrate and was as quick as a flash. It worked perfectly.

Enter Big Mother, Al's then boss. Let's call her F. Now, when Big Mother F. was watching him becoming more loved by an ever-growing flock of friendly students, Big Mother F. grew restless. She had sleepless nights, plagued by visions of Al's individual effort and success. His website worked. Hers didn't. Yet hers was the one all students were supposed to use even if it sucked so much a hooker would decline the offer to earn a few bucks. So what did she do? She formed an evil fellowship with a handful of brown-nosed cronies up and down the corporate ladder and plotted against our friend Al, who soon understood that someone was determined to break his back, if only metaphorically. What could he do to defend himself against The Alliance of the Dumb, who outranked him, outcashed him, and no doubt had an army of lawyers looming in the dark? Al was just one guy. He had no money. He had no knowledge of the law. To add insult to injury, his health was letting him down, and he just didn't have the energy to survive a head-on collision, an all-out-freakin' war. Why would he even want to?

In the end, Al saw himself forced to strip his website of that special magic his students had loved so much. Knowing his website had lost its sparkle, he decided to sink the damn thing altogether as it would forever remind him of the lingering smell of backstabbing bullies and conniving cronies. That unrelenting bitter aftertaste would never leave him be, so he pressed the button. His website was gone.

Al sighed. He realized that sometimes competence bites the dust, and there was nothing he could do about it — that is, without his cousin Vinny doing some serious damage, which might lead to the both of them doing, you know, hard time for a long, long time. And for what? (Not who — what!) No, Al was a peaceful guy. He had no choice but to accept his defeat, which he grudgingly did, telling himself time and again that he was (to hell with them all!) still in one piece. They didn't break him, and they never would. They had just bullied him.

THE END 

Wait.

Did I mention that one fine day Al forged a plan to bring down the entire system? No? Well, he did and it worked, too. He felt like a regular David who had defeated Goliathella The Powerful Dumbass without Goliathella The Powerful Dumbass ever realizing what had hit her or her cronies. Like a magician with more patience than Yoda on a mission, Al had made them disappear in one fell swoop. SSSSSWOOP! And, yes, he had many other amazing adventures before finally returning to the ordinary world of buck-munching desk jockeys and 9-to-5 pencil pushers. His students were waiting. His friends were there. All was good. Inhale. Exhale. But that's... another story.

* * *

Get it? And that website may have been a blog...

102 comments:

  1. this Al sure does sound tons like moiself! Almost to the detail

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    Replies
    1. you reckon such is the destiny of all us poor teachers?

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    2. Hope dies last... although we might die before it.....

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    3. I thought so too as soon as I put the full stop behind that sentence :)

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    4. That's because you're quick-witted.

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    5. Dezzie that is deep..hope will out live us indeed...

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  2. He took the whole system down? Good for him.
    That's what happens with a government controlled school system - it gets dumbed down for everybody. Especially when the higher ups get involved and try and make everything uniform and fair.

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  3. Ugg the cronies at top
    Wit the brown nosing that never does stop
    Sure ruins it for those who actually want to do
    As those at top sit pretty and moo
    A drone society they create
    To which all have to relate
    Or get sucked into jail
    Listening to cousin vinny wail
    But then payback can come due
    Out of the blue
    The system gets crushed
    And the evil witch forever shushed

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    Replies
    1. Out of the blue
      A kick-in-the-butt shoe
      Payback time came due
      Manure and Scooby Doo poo
      As they went boo hoo hoo
      Hope they got the flu

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    2. That isn't serene
      Nasty germs can be mean
      Especially if they spread around
      Then Al may get germs by the pound

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    3. That wouldn't be fun
      Germs on his double bun
      On his face too
      Might as well sniff a blue guy's shoe

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    4. With kangaroo drool
      That wouldn't be cool

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    5. Ain't that the truth?
      And my name ain't Ruth...

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  4. It seems that dumb has a very close relationship with fear. Fear of change, fear of something different, fear of innovation, fear of progress. All contribute to maintaining status quo no matter how dumb it is. I would like to hear about Al's triumphs rather than his defeats.

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  5. It sounds like there could be a tad of jealousy in Big Mother F as Al was a star and she was not. I agree with Pickelope as fear is often the catalyst that starts these plots to overthrow innovation and new thoughts. Out ranked, out cashed, so it sank...perhaps, one fine day Al's treasure will be re-discovered..one never knows. Why can't people expand their minds to new ideas? We need to raise our consciousness not fall into some silent coma. What do I know? I am just a dreamer.

    I think Al is very clever with such an endeavor..

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    Replies
    1. Well, I think you know a lot, True.

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    2. Just swinging by and I like the winter header...let is snow..let it snow..let it snow..not really but, I like the song and look here is a song just for you Blue from True...

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yz4jERLa3Q8

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    3. Delete delete... no snow please ha ha!

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  6. Good for Al! Glad he figured out how to take down the system and that it worked. Don't understand people like Big Mother F.

    betty

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  7. ah, I understand this post, more than I wish I did.
    phft to the eeeeeeeeediots. Yeah, I spelled it wrong on purpose. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nope, bank account low and medium height
      No high around here taking flight lol

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    2. I was hoping you'd struck gold
      You know, yadayada riches untold.
      No?

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  8. Big Mother. F! LOVE that! I'm stealing it. Poor Al...I hate bullies. But...GOOD 'OL AL for coming back with some sweet REVENGE! Good. Power to the people and all that.

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  9. Al got his own justice. Good for him. The dumb collective always exists but you don't have to join them.

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  10. Hey Blue,

    We need more Al's in this world. Those in positions of power can be those who have risen to their own level of incompetence. Yes, they don't want to get caught out as the imposter they truly are. Thus, they choose, at their peril, to target those they feel are vulnerable. This is a way of masking their own very real insecurities they are terrified will be revealed.

    I'm going now and my bordering on incoherent comment shall be blamed on commenting at two in the morning!

    Gary

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    Replies
    1. Your comment is very, very coherent, Gary, always flairy, never scary. Your analysis is crystal clear.

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  11. Oh Joy! Your post is so encouraging. I simply must take the helm of my home. You see... I was going to put up a tree (being that time, again) but I'm exhausted and thought: "I live alone. so who would know if I don't do a tree, besides me?"

    Since reading this "bust a nut" post, I'm thinking to hang a triangle of lights, with them pointing up toward the ceiling. It will work, I'm sure!

    Some dumbass will believe, right? Love you Blue Sugar Dumpling!

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    Replies
    1. Right. Love you too, Dixie Dear. I'm exhausted too.

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    2. Blue, did Dixie just call you a dumpling?

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    3. because you taste good in soups?

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    4. My sugar dumplings have a bit of banana inside, and they are fried.

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  12. Bringing the system down and defeating Goliathella the dumbass. What a boss. And he's a buck-munching desk jockey and 9-to-5 pencil pusher? As things would have it I'm a reformed cubicle monkey and office drone. Al and I have so much in common.

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    Replies
    1. A reformed cubicle monkey and office drone... Say it ain't so. No, he was surrounded by buck-munching desk jockeys and 9-to-5 pencil pushers. There's a difference. ;)

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    2. unfortunately, I am still in a cubicle world...I need to take down some walls...

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    3. That can't be good. Take down those walls, True. Life's too short to be caged. (I know, look who's talking...)

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  13. For the first part: Sigh.
    For the epilogue: Wooooooooooooo!!!

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  14. The dumb shall rise again, as it's the path of least resistance. Never forget, there's a lot of dumb out in the world.

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  15. It takes extreme courage to be a whistleblower when
    all you have for defense is Cousin Vinney!

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  16. Big Mother F sounds like a lot of administrators I've come across over the years....usually in education, sadly enough.

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  17. Okay, you can't leave us in suspense. How did...Al....bring down the entire system.

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    Replies
    1. You may have guessed I can't tell you that or I would've spilled the beans. Suffice it to say that Al drove someone up the wall, and then there was a domino effect.

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    2. Sandra!

      See
      I can do it too, BLUE!

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    3. Times two
      Ran out of responses, poor Blue

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    4. Pat
      Cat
      Sandra
      Blue

      haha - cat that is funny

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  18. Hi Blue...or should I say " dumpling"....hahaha!
    Love your use of Mother F.
    So....did Al have a blog?
    Don't leave us hanging here, Blue!

    Cheers!
    Linda :o)

    Hi Blue...

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    Replies
    1. Blue, why did Linda say CHEERS without offering you a drink.. how very unthoughtful of her... :)

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    2. I have no choice, Linda :) You can can me Blue dumpling.

      She did, Dezz. And I'm so thirsty.

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    3. Cheers! Dezz.....hahaha!
      Wish I could have a drink with BOTH of you guys.....

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    4. which bottoms, if I may ask... not to get confused :)

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    5. Even if we told you, you'd still be confused.

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    6. You got that right Blue! **wink wink nudge nudge*

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    7. Got that, Dazzzzling Dezzmeister from Dezzyland?

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  19. So, what I want to know is, where is Vinny now?

    I've had my fair share of run ins with a Goliath of my own :/ And Thanks to GOD, I defeated that Muthafucka in such a way he didn't even know what hit him.

    I'm glad though... for Al ;)

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    Replies
    1. Vinny? Why, he's right here. Oh dear... a deer!

      Good for you. Seems to me you and Al are two of a kind.

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  20. Well that's just sad but at least Al drove them out.

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  21. Mother F sounds like a Big Fat B! Jealousy is such an ugly trait. I'm glad Al was able to bring down the system. Woot, Woot! Score one for the little guy!

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  22. It's the power of dumb & dumber around here sometimes!!!

    Love your work Al. Glad Mother F was on the relieving end of the Karma Train.

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  23. What goes around comes around right? And even if it doesn't, hopefully one has moved on enough so that it doesn't matter. That's true justice

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