When I cook, nuns flee and curse melodic tunes:
"That Blue will never learn!"
But when you cook, oh magic makes the world go round!
For you know how to strike a balance —
Perhaps learned it the hard way,
But you make it work:
Turn, don't burn. Bake, don't break.
A bit more salt, a bit less pepper;
Patience, too — oh it is the darndest thing.
It's like you know things that I cannot see.
It's like your mind can touch a light, that pure creativity.
Tell me, dear, what is your secret recipe?
You want to know my secret recipe, Dearest Blue? Okay, I’ll tell you.
A lot of sweetness with a pinch of spice, yes, that makes life so nice.
Spread love as sweet as jam, cheer as thick as honey,
And gratitude as warm as fresh baked bread;
Follow those directions for a life well led.
Sometimes the recipe doesn’t turn out as planned, but that’s okay;
You can always try again some other day.
You may have to eat a slice of humble pie,
Just remember when doing so to keep your head held high.
What is it you would like to see?
When the oven closes, look through the window on the door,
There you’ll see the magic you are hoping for.
When I cook, old buzzards run — afraid I'd break their dentures.
Teach me how to make a circle round, show me your adventures.
I'd like to see — I'd like to see... how you manage your time:
How you slice 'n dice, how you use that ole grate;
How you manage your time and make it sublime.
See, I've burned my fingers many times, served too many dishes cold;
I'm as blunt as blunt can be.
I've disappointed when in fact I should have tried.
But when you cook, Theresa, you turn green into gold.
You chop 'n chop and back they come more beautiful than ever:
A dish will come alive as cooking sets you free.
Now, when I chop 'n chop 'n chop, believe me, it all dies — forever.
Voorhees can't slash like me, not even when he tries.
Then Elton sings that salad song, a veggie eulogy:
"It seems to me you lived your life like a carrot in the wind," and then:
"Blue cut you up, real fine and, yes, we never saw you back again."
I lack your Mixed Nuts Zen.
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