MENTAL NOTE

"Though we cannot make our sun stand still, yet we will make him run."
Blue, resist the urge to use facebook. You can do it. Good luck.
Cats and dogs can be friends. So can cowboys and indians. So can we.
Will you ever reach Bora?

Sunday, December 1, 2019

Incomplete Transcript of Lecture Three: Hypersensitivity 2.0

Good morning, students. I'm back. Not to talk about the bleeps that breed hypocrisy— that kind of got me into trouble with the authorities haha — but to delve deeply, and confidently, into the emergence of a new type of hypersensitivity. What we're dealing with is a ubiquitous mental flaw slowly eating away our collective sense of humor and replacing it with a non-debatable set of rules that dictate what is funny and what is not. Big Brother has well and truly arrived, boys and girls, and he is not amused.

[Shows slide #1, assuming a solemn pose like a messenger of great things.]

Take a good look at this stern face. This is George Orwell, the author of 1984, a book no one in this room has ever read. Except maybe for Professor Rumbold sitting over there. Authoritarian states may just be his thing haha.

[Laughter. Professor Rumbold is not amused.]

Morning, Professor Rumbold! Professor Rumbold is the kind gentleman who had me escorted off the premises the last time I spoke here. You may remember. Anyway... who would've thought that Orwell's dystopian novel would ring true today? This may come as a surprise to you, but you have all been successfully brainwashed. You don't realize 2019 is the new 1984.

Everything needs to be controlled. Humor in particular needs to be controlled — or so those who have clout and yell by far the loudest on the internet. You see, even calling you boys and girls is considered an act of sexism, not a sense of humor allowing you to practice how to take a joke and develop a healthy resilience should things ever get really serious one day. Dare I say that many women feel offended when you call them girls, but when you call a group of men boys, somehow it's all right. Humor, men and women of the audience, is under attack, and some would argue that calling you men and women is offensive too. We have to say, "people of the audience" or "members of the audience" or comrades. We have become so sensitive that a joke is all too often seen as an act of violence. I'm not surprised that today's youngsters are not resilient. You make a harsh joke and they break.

This new hypersensitivity knows no bounds, so we keep walking on eggshells and hope for the best: Will I be fired when I say this in public? Is it OK to make this joke? Will I be thrown in the slammer or just be vilified for a couple of months by The Online Social Justice Warrior Brigade, the Thought Police who think they know what's appropriate humor and what is not? And they do not hesitate to keep hammering home the message that a certain type of joke is reprehensible until every single one of us parrots their unifying worldview to our heart's content. Isn't that correct, Professor Rumbold? Or should I say, "Comrade Rumbold"? Somehow Comrade Rumbold does have a politically-correct ring to it.

[Laughter. Professor Rumbold bites his tongue. Professor Blue pretends his hands are puppets.]

"How has your day been, Comrade Rumbold?" 
"Wonderful. Just wonderful. How has your day been, Comrade Blue?" 
"Excellent. Feeling particularly comradorious. Don't you just love this red sky?"
"Yes, I do. Red is my favorite color. In fact, my nickname is Red Rumbold."
"You don't say, Comrade Red Rumbold."

[Laughter. Professor Rumbold dials a number on his phone and looks at Professor Blue.]

So we keep walking on eggshells and pretend everything is fine. Everything is NOT fine. Here is slide #2. The telescreens in Orwell's novel and your mobile phones have a lot in common. You don't have to be a rocket scientist to...

[Two security officers enter the lecture room.]

Well, whaddayaknow, here comes the cavalry. Again. Hello, Security Officers. Put a smile on your grim faces, will you? I know you can say, "Comrad Rumbold." Can you say "Red Rumbold" for me? "Rrrrrrrrrrrumbold." Hey, don't touch me. This isn't funny hahaha. Say: Rrrrrrrrrumbold. Rrrrrrrrrrrumbold.  Comrad Rrrrrrrrumbold. Look, Big Brother is watching me, and he's not amused.

[Professor Rumbold is not amused.]

No sense of humor whatsoever. I rest my case.  Boys and girls, I'm going now! I'm... Don't put your hand on my butt! Study chapters 6 and 8 and grow a spine! I...

[End of transcript.]

* * *

Lecture room 101
Incomplete Transcript of Lecture One: Hypocrisy and the Human Selfie Stick
Incomplete Transcript of Lecture Two: When the Beeps and the Blurs Breed Hypocrisy

20 comments:

  1. Sadly that is so very, very true. People are way too sensitive these days.

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  2. Yep, things have gone too far off the deep end. Like people weren't satisfied with getting rid of the crap, so they kept going. As there is some so-called humor that is just ignorant filth, and that deserves all the flack and more, but "boys" "girls" rolling your eyes, you can't say or do either of that without some cry baby getting offended. This we all win, can do anything without doing nothing, and super sensitive culture needs to take a hike.

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    1. "Like people weren't satisfied with getting rid of the crap, so they kept going." And when you gotta go, you gotta go! Yep, cry babies aplenty throwing a tantrum because some bad man called them... a girl... or... a boy... or... a lady.... or an real man. The frigging nerve! I'm so offended!!!

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  3. Blue, it is just crazy to me how things have changed so much in the last few years. Everything seems to be off limits. You can't say this or that and people are offended by everything. It's not enough for a few people to just not like something, no they have to make a huge deal out of it and get other *sheep* to follow along with their nonsense and try to have it removed, banned, cancelled...whatever.

    These younger people in their 20's seem to be so sensitive to absolutely everything that is said. I sure hope they grow a thicker skin as they mature because life isn't about getting everything you want and they are going to be shocked when they get out into the real world and have to deal with what is thrown at them.

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    1. Well said, Mary. Right on the nail. Life is NOT about getting everything you want simply because you're here and you love your own selfies.

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  4. A creepy post that's absolute truth. I read that Jerry Seinfeld and other comedians no longer perform at college campuses. I'm guessing even very liberal speakers and entertainers like David Sedaris are worried about what they say. Piss ONE person off and it's a public lynching on social media by the masses.

    Good to see you back, Blue!

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    1. Old school comedians are now called toxic people. Everybody is soooo offended. It makes me sick.

      Good to see you too, Bijoux.

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  5. I'm old enough (62 this month) to not care if I say something that might offend someone who is sensitive. I don't intentionally go about trying to hurt people's feelings, but really some people need to get a little bit more thick skinned than they currently are. I hope December is a peaceful month for you Blue!

    betty

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    1. That's the advantage of getting older, betty. I can relate. I don't want to but I can :) But how come so many people are so easily offended? What's your theory?

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  6. Let's add this one to the topics of things that won't get resolved in our lifetime, right? There's grey, grey everywhere!

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    1. Right. Unless we find that magic cup in Indiana Jones. Probably not.

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  7. First off, call me a girl any day!!! Lol. One time someone called me “mam”, and I nearly fell over. I mean, do I look old enough to be a mam?! Oh wait, I’m being hypersensitive. Sorry about that. :)

    Seriously, though you’re right. There’s a fine line, and it’s been crossed. The best is, the true “sexists” are still going around saying all they have to say. (I was in a big corporate meeting last week and got seriously told by some old man “that’s because you *** off the football team.” Excuse me?! These are the people that need to be squashed!). This shift in society is just making the good men walk on eggshells. Let’s go after nepotism instead... I mean, that is what allows the real “bad men” to crush the egg shells to bits, rights?

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    1. First off, call me a girl any day!!! Lol. There ya go! And, no, you don't look old enough to me a mam.

      Did that moron actually say that to you? I guess he knew you are way way way out of his old league and was frustrated in the process. Plus he needs to be kicked in the balls. Twice.

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    2. Yup! Those exact words. He said his daughter was on a local kickline team so I mentioned that I was on a competing team. Apparently he was harboring feelings that we won quite a few competitions. Still not sure what they has to do with the football team though... If I wasn't afraid of being fired or pushed out of my job, I would have reported him and kicked him the balls for good measure.

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    3. You should've sent your cousin Vinny. Such men need to be kicked in the balls on a regular basis. Twice a day at least.

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  8. What do they call it nowadays? 'A WOKE' culture? The world of superoffended libtard snowflakes? I do agree that a lot of offensive things have to be ended (it is easy to say something is just a joke when you are not the target of that joke) but these days so many people are accusing others for nasty things like racism, sexism etc just to score something for themselves. It started all with metoo movement after which people are afraid to have sex or offer sex to anyone, now everybody is afraid to speak anything, I've even see that mother whose kid was sent home because it had two cookies in her lunchbox, so people will now even be afraid to eat... what is next?

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    1. Go woke, go broke. I agree with everything you said, Dezz. These people can go sit on a stick.

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  9. Ah, yes. The woke culture as Dezzy said. You know, I hated 1984 when I first read it, but it's shocking that it seems to be coming to life right before our very eyes. We are not a perfect society and there are things that need standing up for, but it seems like EVERYTHING is offensive these days. However, I don't give a shit and still let what's on my mind come flying out of my mouth whenever I feel like it. It's probably why I don't have many friends LOL.

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    1. "However, I don't give a shit.. See, that's why we all love you so much, Theresa. You don't give a shit and neither do we.

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